Pretty bad music.

Every indie band sounds so much alike that all the musicians are interchangeable.
Indie musicians aren’t very good at playing their instruments and probably learned all that they know from The Beatles.
Werewolf by Cocorosie

“Wow, that song Werewolf really speaks to me, I love her voice. I really think that song is what indie music is truly about”

“Really? Well then you must literally know nothing about music as it is nails on chalkboard. But whatever, we all have different opinions. I just think that a line should be drawn somwhere…”

In it’s true definition, indie music is any music that is produced by unsigned or non major label artists.

Today indie music most commonly refers to a genre of music that is heavily influenced by electronic, folk, and rock music. A good and what is probably the best known artist for this genre is Beck.

However the vast majority of indie music today is shit. The main components to an indie band are:

-A singer and a guitarist or a singer/guitarist
-A bass player, preferably a white male or an Asian female
-A guy on a synthesizer
-A drummer who only does 4/4 beats (I got that from another urban dictionary post)
-Some weird, obscure, or just plain obnoxious instrument

In the many horrible “indie music” bands, the musicians barely know how to play their instruments. The guitarist probably only knows the basic kumbayah chords (A, G, E, C, etc.) and power chords.

The synthesizer player will often times only alternate between the same 3 chords throughout the entire song and tune the synth oscillators to a setting that s/he finds the most unique- no matter how horrible it sounds.

And lastly, whatever weird instrument that they have, they will absolutely 100% not know how to play it.

Next are the lyrics which are dreadful. Anyone can write typical indie music lyrics in five seconds. They are usually about a girl with brunnette hair and her surrounding environment.

e.g.
The brown hair covers your eyes
And I see the ocean behind those eyes
You’re like a flower in a vint…

Indie music is god-awful music. the bands seem to think that being popular is bad. boring riffs, boring, drums, no bass, and really bad singers. this music is straight bad. the bands always have to have obnoxious names that start with “the” and then 3 unrelated words. oh and concerts are “shows”.
Indie fan-”hey i heard The unborn trash machine” is going to have a show, but i prefer “the kingdom of toxcity” and “the hairy gumperts” are good too. they are the epitome of indie music.

Indie fan 2-”aww man “the plural nouns” are really good compared to “the running away” but “the many horses” are fantastic. “the of montreal” is great.

Real Rocker- “FUCK YOUR SHIT, FUCKING CRYPTOPSY, INDIE MUSIC SUCKS BALL SACKS”

The practice of strumming slightly distorted guitar to a 4/4, bass, bass tom, drumbeat while wailing words ripped straight out of the rhyming dictionary. Exponents of this art are often seen trying to look like a replica of 1970’s John lennon or, for the more alternative; cardigans, painted nails and eyeliner while banging on about being ‘working class’.

Fortunately, for budding musicians, indie music is so easy to reproduce that most ‘indie fans’ are in a band within two months of picking up a guitar, or drums, playing various covers by their indie heros.

The main exponents of this art improve little from these meagre beginnings – eventually writing songs of their own, with the requisite 4/4 drumbeat and strummed chords. Those who make it big will be touted by the NME or the Guardian as being ‘the next big thing’ while getting rave reviews for their university tours of britain. Examples of these can be seen everywhere in Britain from Oasis to Radiohead.

Indie fans will further try to convince people that indie music is original from the introduction of a piano or (ghasp)a clarinet into the formulaic peice or, in the other direction, playing some power chords and sounding like Nirvana. Unfortunately this does little to relieve the boredom in indie music as the same hash is re-hashed again and again.
A: Who’s your favourite band?
B: The Toes, they’re the next big thing according to the NME. I saw them in the Camden Monarch.
A: Oh i’ve heard of them. My band does a few covers of their songs. Still don’t think they’ll beat Radiohead for songs that mean so much to me though.
B: I know what you mean; radiohead redefined music as we think of it.
A: you’re right there, mate. Oh i learned a new chord – ‘B’
B: Show me…..

Sub standard music + hype + fashion/fad = Indie

The music is repetitive, simple and stolen from the past.

The fans think it’s the best music of all time, not knowing that the above is true.

And of course, there are tonnes of the fans because who in being ‘individual’, are all the same.
Indie Kid “I luv the Kooks, they’re so original!11

No-one has EVER done guitar-based pop about girls before!!

Indie music is breaking all trends!”

Someone with more than one braincell “It IS a trend, you feckless tit”